Baileys Blog

14th December 2018

Minus 4 and dry when driving in.

We were delighted with Hes No Trouble’s run at Warwick yesterday.. The ground would have been quick enough for him as he prefers soft ground.

He looked all over the winner turning for home and then slightly ran out of puff.. There will be plenty of improvement and he looks a good sort for The Jockey Clubs South West Racing Syndicate.

There was a big turn out yesterday to see their first runner.. a fun day and a good one.

Warwick suffered from an invasion of travellers which resulted in the owners and trainers car park being closed off… It was full of caravans and smart cars.. mostly white.. not sure why white should be the preferred vehicle colour for travellers; anyway they were clean and smarter than most of my owners cars...

Back from Warwick to Cheltenham to look at the Tattersall’s sales horses.. tonight they sell after racing.

Friday of a Cheltenham meeting is always busy and today was no exception.

David Bass was in for a couple off lots.. David has his concussion test this afternoon to see if he can ride tomorrow..

Darren Smith brought along Martin Elton to see his KBRP horses Vinndication and Arthur’s Sixpence.

Mark and Marion Hudson and son Chip were here to see their KBRP horse Bandon Roc and Espoir De Romay

Peter Bennet-Jones was here to see his Prince Llywellyn and his Racing For Maggies horse Another Venture

Rolf Johnson who runs Highclere Thoroughbreds was here to see their horse Alfie Corbitt.

Steve Adams  was here to see his KBRP horses Pond Road and Silver Kayf

All the above stayed for breakfast and were joined by Thomas Montgomery and Chris Sutton who were here for 'a morning on the gallops and breakfast'  .. A Maggie’s Charity auction winner

Third lot Steve Jaggard was here to see his KBRP horse Lord Apparelli

And then finally 20 members of Hot To Trot Racing were here to see their horse Early Learner..

Exhausting!! We have no runners today..

We are refurbishing the round sand gallop.. more sand and some has blown away in the hot summer..

Maybe you have heard that a lot of radio stations, etc have decided to pull “Baby it’s Cold Outside” from their playlist this year because someone was offended, citing unwanted and inappropriate advances by the male singing the song.
I feel that these other holiday songs must also be removed as they are offensive as well.
1. I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus: subjecting minors to softcore porn

2. The Christmas Song: Open fire? Pollution. Folks dressed up like Eskimos?  Cultural appropriation

3. Holly Jolly Christmas: Kiss her once for me?  Unwanted advances

4. White Christmas? Racist

5. Santa Claus is Coming to Town: Sees you when you’re sleeping? Knows when you’re awake?  Peeping Tom stalker

6. Most Wonderful Time of the Year: Everyone telling you be of good cheer?   Forced to hide depression

7. Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer: Bullying

8. It’s Beginning to Look a Lot Like Christmas: Forced gender-specific gifts: dolls for Janice and Jen and boots and pistols (GUNS!) for Barney and Ben

To finish Happy Birthday to my longest serving member of staff.. Liam Higgins.. Higgs.

13th December 2018

Plus 1 and dry when driving in. Blowing a cold easterly wind.

Sunblazer last night was slightly disappointing. He came to win his race and then that was that. He finished 4th. It did not stop some keyboard warriors mailing me about the ride he was given by Jim Crowley.. Really what next? Strangely no numbers

Well the BHA report came out yesterday… In fact a great deal came out yesterday. Some stayed in and market forces dictated the news. Teresa May grabbed the headlines here, while abroad a gun man tragically killed and wounded people in Strasbourg and finally Sky announced that it was not supporting their Cycling team any more. Racing headlines were missed for a change.

I have not read the whole report but its 17 headliner changes are the obvious ones and shows that the BHA are listening to the general public.. I hope not too much.

The Martin Pipe conditional jockeys race might as well be scarped as a Festival race as now the jockeys will not be allowed to claim their allowance .. But they can claim their allowance in all other handicaps which does not make a great deal of sense if you are banning in one race.... Did you know that the only handicap you cannot claim your weight alowance in is the The Grand National?

One of The Veterinary factor which will cause the big trainers some monumental headaches..

'Trainers of all horses competing at the festival must have completed a medication declaration form, returned to the BHA equine health and welfare department, ten days before the day of the race in which the horse is entered to run. Submission of the completed form is the responsibility of the trainer concerned. This form will outline medication that the horse has received in the previous 35 days, and any medication with a long-term effect that the horse has received in the previous six months.. Gordon Elliott, Willie Mullins and co will be signing forms for a huge number of horse who might not even run at the meeting..

Thursday is our easy day and on that note we have just the one runner. Hes No Trouble heads to Warwick and for my thoughts please click here.

This tweet made me laugh..

Those of you who are placing Christmas lights/decorations in your yards, can you please avoid anything red or Blue flashing lights together?

Every time I come around the corner, I think it’s the police and I have a panic attack.

I have to brake hard, toss my vodka, fasten my seatbelt, throw my phone on the floor, turn my radio down, and push the gun under my seat. All while trying to put my cloths back on.

Its just too much drama, even for Christmas. Thank you for your cooperation and understanding

12th December 2018

Plus 4 and dry when driving in.

David Bass was in to ride out one lot this morning while Jonjo O’Neill Junior was in for two..

We worked a few and jumped Vinndication, Bandon Roc, Early Learner and Fubar. Watch this mornings action here: First Lot, Second Lot, Third Lot, Schoolers

Quentin and Christine Bevan were here second lot to see their horse Fubar and stayed for breakfast.

Michael Wills, Clare brother, who stayed last night also appeared for breakfast.. better than cooking his own back at our house!

Third lot Liz Humphrey and Susan Taylor were here to see their KBRP horses Yeavering Belle, Pond Road and Royal Supremo.

Big day for Sunblazer too as he runs at Kempton this evening and for my thoughts on his chances please click here..

Sun was out yesteray gave me a chance to take some photos of this years youngsters..Most will run in bumpers in the spring.

Yesterday Peter and Lavinia Sidgwick, Pete and Moo Mordaunt and I  took Peter's mother Gill Sidgwick out to lunch at Russell’s in Broadway. Gill who is 88 was in great heart and if you have never been to Russells go.. it is very good..

This is for Andrew Riley.

A young woman walks into a Chartered accountant's office and tells him that she needs to file her tax Returns.

The accountant says, 'Before we begin, I'll need to ask you a few questions.'

He gets her name, address etc. and then asks, ' What's your occupation?'

'I'm a prostitute', she says.

The accountant is taken aback and says, 'That's too gross. Let's try to re-phrase that."

The woman says, 'OK, I'm a high-end call girl' .

'No, that still won't work. Need something more acceptable.'

They both think for a minute; then the woman says, 'I'm an elite poultry farmer.'

The accountant asks, 'What does poultry farming have to do, with being a prostitute?'

'Well, I raised a thousand cocks last year.'

Chartered Acct : 'Brilliant !! *Poultry Farmer" it is !!! and Agricultural Income is tax-free.'

11th December 2018

Plus 3 and dry when driving in.

Musselburgh did not go quite as planned. Thibault finished 4th

Bizzarely he finished where he should have if you take a line through his potential handicap mark. On his Kempton run he would be rated 110 and yesterday he finished 11 lengths behind a horse rated 122..

Bandon Roc and Younevercall had an away day.

Rob and Kathy George were here first lot to see her South West Racing Club horse Hes No Trouble canter.

Third lot Keith and Liz Ellis were here third lot to see their horse Abbreviate.

Tomorrow the BHA publishes their review of the fatalities at this years Cheltenham festival. It will be very interesting to see what they say as racing as a whole must listen to what is happening outside our sport.

We have just the one runner today at Uttoxeter. Johnny Ocean heads there and for my thoughts on his chances please click here.

This weeks movers and shakers in the BHA handicap charts were...Commodore Barry up 1 to 132, Another Venture down 1 to 132, Sainte Ladylime down 1 to 136, Newtide enters at 122, Two For Gold enters at 131 and the one I am going really mad about is Mon Palois who fell at the second last on Saturday at Wetherby goes up 4 to 124.

We welcome Ben Love back to the yard this morning. Ben who came over from Ireland to be my conditional jockey only to have a horrid fall days before he was due to attend the BRS jockey course.. He broke his elbow in the fall.. second time around lets hope it all goes well for Ben.

Mother Superior was on her way to late morning prayers when she passed two novices just leaving early morning prayers on their way to classes.

As she passed the young ladies, Mother Superior said, "Good morning ladies."

The novices replied, "Good morning, Mother Superior, may God be with you."

But after they had passed, Mother Superior heard one say to the other, "I think she got up on the wrong side of the bed this morning."

This startled Mother Superior, but she chose not to pursue the issue.

A little further down the hall, Mother Superior passed two of the sisters who had been teaching at the convent for several years.  

She greeted them with "Good morning Sister Martha, Sister Jessica, may God give you the wisdom for our students today."

"Good morning, Mother Superior. Thank you and may God be with you."

But again after passing, Mother Superior overheard, "She got up on the wrong side of the bed today."

Baffled, she started to wonder if she had spoken harshly or with an irritated look on her face. She vowed to be more pleasant.

Looking down the hall, Mother Superior saw retired Sister Mary approaching, step by step, with her walker. 

As Sister Mary was rather deaf, Mother Superior had plenty of time to arrange a pleasant smile on her face before greeting Sister Mary.  

"Good morning, Sister Mary, I'm so happy to see you up and about. I pray God watches over you today, and grants you a wonderful day."

"Ah, good morning, Mother Superior. I see you got up on the wrong side of the bed this morning."

Mother Superior was floored! "Sister Mary, what have I done wrong?" I have tried to be pleasant but three times already today people have said that about me."

Sister Mary stopped her walker and looked Mother Superior in the face. "Oh, don't take it personally, Mother Superior. It's just that you're wearing Father Murphy's slippers."

10th December 2018

Plus 7 and dry when driving in.

Well that was a weekend and a half..

I have always wanted to win the Peterborough Chase..A race with history..

Charbel put up a stunning performance yesterday to win the Tattersalls Ireland Edredon Bleu Chase Peterborough Chase..

It was a hugely deserved win for David and Julie Martin’s stunning gelding, although the sad part was that David Bass missed out after a nasty fall on Mon Palois the day before at Wetherby. Concussed and banned for 6 days.. David, not the horse who is fine.

Able deputy was Noel Fehily who might be one of the oldest jockeys in the weighing room but he is still one of the best. He and Charbel gelled and put up a wonderful performance which was hugely appreciated by all who were there

Thank god the sponsors kept the original race name otherwise who would have know that Charbel had won his first graded race. 

All too often race names disappear under a sponsors titles.. Can't wait for the Gold Cup to be sponsored by Anne Summers!

David Bass started Saturday as he hoped it would with a winner on Two For Gold in the novice hurdle; they won well.. from thereon the day went down hill.

Aliandy pulled too hard and would not settle .. he finished 4th.

Mon Palois who so annoyingly missed a brilliant winning opportunity last weekend at Doncaster only for the race to be called off due to unsafe ground, fell ..and then Mergeela in the bumper just could not handle the soft ground and finished down the field.. a family problem?

I was at Chepstow where there was no big screen TV, anyway Full Tilt ran a race of promise to finish 3rd ridden by Jonjo O’Neill junior.. A first O’Neill to ride for me as I think his father had packed up riding before I started??

Peeping Tom struggled and Another Venture ran a race that the famous Capt T Forster would have been proud of.

Our Other runners of weekend, Sea Story finish 4th at Kelso.. slightly disappointingly as I hoped she would have fared better..Silver Kayf ran with promise to finish 5th at Huntingdon on his first attempt over fences.. on form that is where he should have finished.

Monday morning..First Flow and Sadlermor had an away day.

We have one runner today at Musselburgh. Thibault heads there and for my thoughts on his chances please click here.

An american winter snow..

8:00 - I made a snowman.

8:10 - A feminist passed by and asked me why I didn't make a snow woman.

8:15 - So, I made a snow woman.

8:17 - My feminist neighbor complained about the snow woman's voluptuous chest saying it objectified snow women everywhere.

8:20 - The gay couple living nearby threw a hissy fit and moaned it could have been two snow men instead.

8:22 - The transgender man..woman...person asked why I didn't just make one snow person with detachable parts.

8:25 - The vegans at the end of the lane complained about the carrot nose, as veggies are food and not to decorate snow figures with.

8:28 - I am being called a racist because the snow couple is white.

8:31 - The Muslim gent across the road demands the snow woman wear a burqa.

8:40 - The Police arrive saying someone has been offended.

8:42 - The feminist neighbor complained again that the broomstick of the snow woman needs to be removed because it depicted women in a domestic role.

8:43 - The council equality officer arrived and threatened me with eviction.

8:45 - TV news crew from the ABC shows up. I am asked if I know the difference between snowmen and snow-women? I reply, "Snowballs" and am now called a sexist.

9:00 - I'm on the News as a suspected terrorist, racist, homophobic, sensibility offender, bent on stirring up trouble during difficult weather.

9:10 - I am asked if I have any accomplices. My children are taken by social services.

9:29 - Far left protesters offended by everything are marching down the street demanding for me to be beheaded.

Moral: There is no moral to this story. It's just a view of the world in which we live today, and it is only getting worse.

Life needs a laugh at times and the person who send me this link sums it all up..

8th December 2018

Plus 8 and dry when driving in.

I failed to make Sandown.

We have had no telephone line for about 3 days, but the good news is that probably nobody wanted to speak to me anyway..

Forgetting that fact we will be back on line, or rather BT might have us back with a phone line by Tuesday… BT’s engineer who seemed to be with us all day was very helpful and was seen clambering around my office and up our many poles.

Sandie in yesterday morning sorting invoices and trying to cope with the above was not easy.

Sandown looked after the owners of Knockanrawley by an invitation to the Royal Box for lunch.. A good start to their day? Sadly there was one person missing..

Amateur races can be like their title and yesterday was no exception. One horse in front regularly dived right and caused havoc and again that happened blinding KAR so that he missed a fence and landed on top of it.. race over… Disappointing. He is fine this morning

Low sun made the stewards call the Pond fence un jumpable.. That was if the horse was ridden... all the loose horses jumped and saw the fence with ease!

Saturday morning. No David Bass to ride out as he had to leave before 7 to get to Wetherby

Neil and Olivia Donovan were here second lot to see their KBRP horse Shantou Express

Adrian Baggaley (no Show) Vince O'Connell and Daughter Lizzie were here for a morning on the gallops and breakfast.

We jumped Silver Kayf and Charbel over tyres.

We have a very busy weekend.

I am heading to Chepstow today where we run Full Tilt, Peeping Tom and Another Venture. Mat heads to Wetherby where we run Two For Gold, Aliandy, Mon Palois and Mergeela.

Tomorrow I am heading to Huntingdon where we run Silver Kayf and Charbel, while Harry Moss, my pupil assistant, heads to Kelso where we run Sea Story... For my thoughts on all our runners please click here.

Before you head off for your days racing or whatever you are doing this weekend; please could I ask you to click here and watch this..

7th December 2018

Plus 11 and raining hard when driving in. We have had a bucket full of rain overnight.

I so nearly started my association with the very successful  Hot To Trot syndicate with a winner at Leicester yesterday.. It would have been their first jumps winner.. It was not to be as Early Learner finished a very gallant second..

Yes hate seconds and oh dear her handicap mark is already ruined!!

Early Learner either ran far better than we expected or was it that the opposition did not.. Whatever it was a good run and a fun day with new owners.

Leicester is not my favourite racecourse.. Is it the drive or that fact that the course is usually pretty quiet? It is not the course itself.. for the horses it is ok.

I do feel feel sorry for them that their chase course is unraceable, so much so that we have decided to retired By The Boardwalk.

BTBW won his veteran race at Huntingdon about a month ago and his next target was always going to be a race at Leicester next week.

BTBW wants fast or good ground and a right handed track and frankly now we have run out of options.

I believe in retiring horses rather than racing on into a life they enjoy no more, and John Perris, who owns and just loves this stunning son of Presenting is also keen that his favourite horse should have a happy life after racing, being ridden and used for a non racing life.

It will not be hard to find a great home for BTBW who has been a gent to train.

Pond Road and Miss Gemstone had an away day this morning. Mikey Hamill and Jonathan Burke doing the honours.

Sandie Wilkinson my accounts secretary was in this morning. Invoices to send out and plenty to do in the office this morning. Racing on a regular basis has meant that I have not been in the office with Sandie at the same time for about 3 weeks!.

Talking racing we have the one runner at Sandown this afternoon. Knockanrawley, who also has entered the veteran stage of life, runs there in an amateur riders chase and Martin McIntyre rides; Martin, who is one of the top point to point riders, used to work for me. For my thoughts on their chances please click here.

I dont know whether you watched or listened to George Bush's address at his fathers funeral. If you have 10 minutes free then it is certainly well worth listening to..Click here to do so.

Q.  Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact?
A.  Breasts don't have eyes.

Q.  What's the difference between a Southern zoo, and a Northern zoo?
A.   A Southern zoo has a description of the animal on the front of the cage, along with a recipe.

Q.  What's the Cuban National Anthem?
 A.  Row row row your boat.

To finish. We like our owners doing well..

Well done to Vince and Gill Burmingham, who last night won 'Employer of the Year' at last night Caring UK awards dinner.

Vince who owns and runs Hendra House has shares in our KBRP horses Commodore Barry, Arthurs Sixpence, Subway Surf, Silver Kayf and todays runner Knockanrawley.

PS.. Mrs B is keen on a contra deal on training fees and looking after me..

6th December 2018

Plus 10 and dry when driving in.

It was anything but dry yesterday

It poured at Haydock but that did not stop huge celebrations when we had two good winners. Newtide won the novice hurdle and Mr Grey Sky won the bumper.

It was very soft and sloppy ground.

Newtide and Johnny Burke jumped off in front in the hope that they might stay pristine clean, but it was not to be as when they arrived at the last bend they was overtaken and looked for all that they were going backwards all rather too quickly.

Johnny gave Newtide a back hander with his soft padded whip and Newtide realised that he meant business; so he bucked his ideas up and came back through the pack to take the lead again by the second last.

The last was too small to worry about for this huge horse and he powered away to win well, and looks a very decent prospect.. chasing is going to be his game, but not for another year..

Michael and Mary Dulverton, who bought this stunning son of Getaway at the Punchestown sales with David Minton almost two years ago have been hugely patient and this was a much deserved win..He looks to be a very decent horse..

Phil Andrews must think owning racehorses an easy pastime..

Last week his Those Tiger Feet won the bumper at Hereford and yesterday his Mr Grey Sky did the same.That makes three out of three with his horses this season.. Dandy Dan being the third.

I have always just loved this big grey son of Fame and Glory.

Aiden Murphy and I bought him at the Derby Sale 18 months ago and my opinion has not changed from the first time I saw him.. I had to have him and now he looks a bit special. Again this chap will stay in bumpers this season before going hurdling next.

It was a good ride from Mikey Hamill.. Wing mirrors not needed yesterday, but frankly it was so dark by the time the bumper was run they would not have been very useful anyway.

Phil and Gill Andrews have invested heavily here at Thorndale and yesterday was a big family day out.. Train from London and the journey home would have been a good one..

I was at Ludlow where too it had rained all day.. The ground had gone soft and we hoped that would not stop Red River.

It was probably too soft for him but having said that he looked like the winner three from home when slipping and doing the splits on landing.. David Bass immediately pulled him up.. poor RR is a bit stiff this morning and will take a few days to recover..

I like Ludlow and my have they improved their owners and trainers facility.

Ludlow has always given great prize money, but now their owners are treated well too.. .. Good to see Duncan Williams there yesterday.. He is looking forward to seeing his Whatabaloo run in the spring (Those Tiger Feet’s half brother)

Thursday morning.

John and Laura Garrett were here third lot to see their KBRP horses Commodore Barry, Red River, Lord Apparelli and Pond Road and their Racing For Maggies Another Venture.

I heading to Leicester to watch Early Learner run and for my thoughts on her chances please click here.

We have a new owners of the month. Ian and Pam Farmsworth.. Click here to read their brilliant interview..

Q.   Why does Mike Tyson cry during sex?
A.   Mace will do that to you.

Q.   Why did OJ Simpson want to move to West Virginia?
A.  Everyone has the same DNA.

Q.   What would you call it when an Italian has one arm shorter than the other?
A.  A speech impediment.

To finish..Happy birthday to Paul Vogt..

5th December 2018

Plus 6 and drizzling when driving in.

Three out of four. That is Commodore Barry’s total of wins to runs.

Yesterday at Southwell CB took the 3 mile novice hurdle in fine style.. jumping off in front and never being headed. Ears pricked enjoying himself.. We like that, as do his owners The Commodores..Vince Burmingham, Caroline Swire, Chris Trigg, Anne Waters, Brian Cognet, John Garrett and Angeles Kennedy.

Commodore Barry is by the sire Presenting and most of his offspring prefer better ground and CB will probably wait for better ground in the spring.. A chaser in the making.

Sainte Ladylime loves heavy ground so it was not heavy enough for her, but she ran well enough to finish 3rd .. The eye catcher of the meeting in the Racing Post.

David Bass was in this morning and we worked a few and jumped..Full Tilt, Cloone Lady, Early Learner, Vinndication, Charbel, Dandy Dan and Thibault.

Helen Hibbert along with Caroline and Louise were here third lot to see Helens KBRP horse Shantou Express

Louis Gill  was also here third lot to see his KBRP horse Mergeela

Graham Potts was here mid morning..

We have three runners today. Mat is heading to Haydock to saddle Newtide and Mr Grey Sky while I head to Ludlow to saddle Red River.. For my thoughts on their chances please click here.

Moira (Frisky) Nutting who was Captain Forster's secretary for many years died over the weekend. Frisky was instrumental in me keeping Lois Duffey as an owner. Frisky lived up to her name as she was very much a fun personality. Thoughts to her husband Nick..

Q.  Why don't bunnies make noise when they have sex?
A.  Because they have cotton balls.

Q.   What's the difference between a porcupine and a BMW?
A.   A porcupine has the pricks on the outside.

Q.  What did the blonde say when she found out she was pregnant?
A.  Are you sure it's mine?"

Q.   What's the difference between Beer Nuts and Deer Nuts?
A.   Beer Nuts are $1, and Deer Nuts are always under a buck.

4th December 2018

0 degrees and dry when driving in.

Yesterday was the annual HWPA lunch, or piss up in London.. Sore heads this morning?

No vet in today as he is coming tomorrow.. Graham Potts busy today.

Tuesday is a day when the handicapper reassesses the horses who ran last week.. always a difficult morning for trainers… especially if they have finished second..

Anyway this weeks movers and shakers in the BHA handicap charts are Agent Memphis up 2 to 100 over hurdles and up 5 to 103 over fences, Diamond Gait has been given a mark of 127 over hurdles, Mr Macho up 3 to 125, Blazon has been given a mark of 60 on the flat, Abbreviate up 3 to 126, Rocky's Treasure up 3 to 147 and finally Wandrin Star up 12 to 137!

We have a couple of runners today at Southwell. Commodore Barry and Sainte Ladylime and for my thoughts on their chances please click here.

Mat is heading to Southwell as I am joining Kevin and Dermot Clancy.. Two For Gold’s owners annual Christmas day out and planned for a while. TFG heads to Wetherby on Saturday, all being well.

Q.  Why does the bride always wear white?
A.   Because it's good for the dishwasher to match the stove and refrigerator.

Q.   A brunette, a blonde, and a redhead are all in third grade.  Who has the biggest boobs?
A.   The blonde, because she's 18.

Q.    Which sexual position produces the ugliest children?
A.    Ask your Mom.

Q.   What is the quickest way to clear out a men's restroom?
A.    Say, "Nice Dick."