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15th June 2019

Plus 10 and dry when driving in. A first for this week.

David Bass was in for one lot this morning. With todays meeting at Worcester washed away Disco Dave needs to keep his fitness levels up, so rather than lie in bed he was here for one lot!

Joking of course because David really does work hard. We jumped Mergeela and Thibault.

What a week it has been and I just hope we have had the rain needed to keep us away from a hosepipe ban later in the summer.

Archie was meant to have been playing cricket for his county tomorrow, but his pitch was under water yesterday. Cancelled.

It felt odd watching England thrash the West Indies yesterday. Not because they were so much better, but because the sun looked like it was shining down there in Southampton while we had biblical rain here.

Vodafone is certainly not top of the customer care lists.

Yesterday they threw a shocker at me.. My monthly bill arrived and it had doubled..

I rang to check why and after spending the best part of 30 minutes waiting to speak to a customer advisor I was finally was able to talk to somebody whose time zone was certainly not the same as ours and was difficult to understand.

The long and short of my conversation was that Vodafone apologised for the mistake and my bill was wrong..Apparently their system of billing has changed this month so my complaint was a common one..

Now I know only too well that if I had not spent that hour on the phone my bill would have been paid and Vodafone would have happily said nothing… I would suggest you too have a close look at your latest bill, if you happen to be on the dreaded Vodafone network.

We have no runners this weekend and being Fathers Day tomorrow my daughter Pandora and her husband James are coming over for lunch..

My recent 4 purchases from the Goffs Landrover Sales arrived early yesterday morning wioth Martin Jones.. Martin will now start breaking them in ..

A friend went to Beijing recently and was given this brochure by the hotel. It is precious.
She is keeping it and reading it whenever she feels depressed.
Obviously, it has been translated directly, word for word from Mandarin to English.

Getting There:
Our representative will make you wait at the airport. The bus to the hotel runs along the lake shore. Soon you will feel pleasure in passing water. You will know that you are getting near the hotel, because you will go round the bend. The manager will await you in the entrance hall. He always tries to have intercourse with all new guests.
The Hotel:
This is a family hotel, so children are very welcome. We of course are always pleased to accept adultery. Highly skilled nurses are available in the evenings to put down your children.  Guests are invited to conjugate in the bar and expose themselves to others.   But please note that ladies are not allowed to have babies in the bar. We organize social games, so no guest is ever left alone to play with them self.
The Restaurant:
Our menus have been carefully chosen to be ordinary and unexciting. At dinner, our quartet will circulate from table to table, and fiddle with you.
Your Room:
Every room has excellent facilities for your private parts. In winter, every room is on heat. Each room has a balcony offering views of outstanding obscenity ! ....  You will not be disturbed by traffic noise, since the road between the hotel and the lake is used only by pederasts.
Your bed has been made in accordance with local tradition. If you have any other ideas please ring for the chambermaid.   Please take advantage of her. She will be very pleased to squash your shirts, blouses and underwear. If asked, she will also squeeze your trousers.
Above All:
When you leave us at the end of your holiday, you will have no hope. You will struggle to forget it.

Have a good weekend and see you on Monday.