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26th October 2022

Plus 14 and dry when driving in..

That was a good day in the office..

Chianti Classico won well at Chepstow for Francis Brooke and Richard Pilkington and then Getaweapon won for John Perriss at Bangor.. A Welsh Double!

Chianti Classico's race looked a very hot novice hurdle and David Bass struggled to get CC to settle.. he eventually did and then with a good jump at the last sealed his length win over the favourite..

Getaweapon was well ridden by Kai Lenihan who took a very useful 10lbs off her back.. A plan that John Periss and I discussed last week..

Bangor was busy, but sadly there was a disaster when Ben Sutton took a horrid fall and was taken to Hospital.. Fingers crossed that he will be OK..

Going back to Bangor.. They are brilliant at looking after owners and yesterday after a slight hiccup when John Perriss's table was busier than expected.. Quickly sorted by the excellent team there and all went home very happy..

Our last 3 runners have all won.. and all 3 ran and won in Wales.. Shinobi started the ball rolling at Ffos Las on Sunday.. AND no I am not moving over the border!!

Tatersalls horses in training sales .. More huge prices and the sale was up again on last year.

Wednesday morning.

David Bass and Ciran Gethings were in to ride out.. We worked a few and jumped a few too.... It was dark and wet first lot and then the sun came out..

Kevin Clancy and Stephen Cannon were here second lot to see their horse Two For Gold

Tony and Charlotte Palmer were here to see their KBRS horses Isle Of Gold and General Hubble.

James Coxon and Ruth Perera were here to see James's KBRS horse Grand Escapade

Ireland beat England in the T20 World Cup..

Peter Wheatley sent this one over..

Nelson: "Order the signal, Hardy."

Hardy: "Aye, aye sir."

Nelson: "Hold on, this isn't what I dictated to Flags. What's the meaning of this?"

Hardy: "Sorry sir?"

Nelson (reading aloud): "England expects every person to do his or her duty, regardless of race, gender, sexual orientation, religious persuasion or disability. 'What gobbledygook is this for God's sake?"

Hardy: "Admiralty policy, I'm afraid, sir. We're an equal opportunities employer now. We had the devil's own job getting 'England' past the censors, lest it be considered racist."

Nelson: "Gadzooks, Hardy. Hand me my pipe and tobacco."

Hardy: "Sorry sir. All naval vessels have now been designated smoke-free working environments."

Nelson: "In that case, break open the rum ration. Let us splice the main brace to steel the men before battle."

Hardy: "The rum ration has been abolished, Admiral. It's part of the Government's policy on binge drinking."

Nelson: "Good heavens, Hardy. I suppose we'd better get on with it, full speed ahead."

Hardy: "I think you'll find that there's a 4 knot speed limit in this stretch of water. It's an environment protection initiative."

Nelson: "Damn it man! We are on the eve of the greatest sea battle in history. We must advance with all dispatch. Report from the crow's nest, please."

Hardy: "That won't be possible, sir."

Nelson: "What?"

Hardy: "Health and Safety have closed the crow's nest, Sir. No harness; and they said that rope ladders don't meet regulations. They won't let anyone up there until proper scaffolding can be erected."

Nelson: "Then get me the ship's carpenter without delay, Hardy."

Hardy: "He's busy knocking up a wheelchair access to the foredeck Admiral."

Nelson: "Wheelchair access? I've never heard anything so absurd."

Hardy: "Anti-discrimination requirements, sir. We have to provide a barrier-free environment for the differently abled....."

Nelson: "Differently abled? I've only one arm and one eye and I refuse even to hear mention of the word. I didn't rise to the rank of Admiral by playing the disability card."

Hardy: "Actually, sir, you did. The Royal Navy is under-represented in the areas of visual impairment and limb deficiency."

Nelson: "Whatever next? Give me full sail. The salt spray beckons."

Hardy: "A couple of problems there too, sir. Health and safety won't let the crew up the rigging without hard hats. And they don't want anyone breathing in too much salt; haven't you seen the adverts?"

Nelson: "I've never heard such infamy. Break out the cannon and tell the men to stand by to engage the enemy."

Hardy: "The men are a bit worried about shooting at anyone, Admiral."

Nelson: "What? This is mutiny!"

Hardy: "It's not that, sir. It's just that they're afraid of being charged with murder if they actually kill anyone. There are a couple of legal-aid lawyers on board, watching everyone like hawks."

Nelson: "Then how are we to sink the Frenchies and the Spanish?"

Hardy: "Actually, sir, we're not."

Nelson: "We're not?"

Hardy: "No, sir. The French and the Spanish are our European partners now. According to the Common Fisheries Policy, we shouldn't even be in this stretch of water. We could get hit with a claim for compensation."

Nelson: "But you must hate a Frenchman as you hate the devil."

Hardy: "I wouldn't let the ship's diversity coordinator hear you saying that sir. You'll be up on disciplinary report."

Nelson: "You must consider every man an enemy who speaks ill of your King."

Hardy: "Not any more, sir. We must be inclusive in this multicultural age. Now put on your Kevlar vest; it's the rules. It could save your life."

Nelson: "Don't tell me - health and safety again! Whatever happened to rum, sodomy and the lash?"

Hardy: ""As I explained, sir, rum is off the menu! And there's a ban on corporal punishment."

Nelson: "What about sodomy?"

Hardy: "I believe that is now legal, sir."

Nelson: "In that case kiss me Hardy”

To finish.. Happy birthday to Ian Bullerwell..